english paper sigh

Will Michaels sat in the driver's seat of his car, just listening to the engine's thrumming, sonorous sound. He felt like he hadn't been here in decades. Hands gripping the steering wheel of his Cadillac, Will's stormy blue gaze searched the parking lot in a gyre looking for any sign of life. It was the beginning of November, practically Christmas time. He doubted anyone would be here. Although, he knew someone who would always be at the camp. Hale. Of course, Hale hadn't been at the camp when Will had tried to... Will shook his head, remembering what the doctors had told him. He was happy now. He wasn't about to let something as stupid as wondering who was at camp bring up his old life. Will was a different person now. He was all clean and healthy and revitalized. Well, he wasn't a completely new person, he was just back to his old happy, charismatic self. With a hint of somberness, however. Ever since the bad thing had happened, he'd been incognito in the mortal world, simply cutting off all contact with his family. "It was for the best," he remembered telling the doctors along with another long sonnet of other lies. Will threw the car into parking position and turned the engine off, climbing out quickly. He moved with an almost hesitation in the way he stepped, as if he wasn't sure what to do anymore. It was almost as if the half-son of Zeus forgot what it was like to be a normal healthy person. "I can do this." He repeated to himself the words he'd been saying over and over again for the last four hours. This was one thing he knew he could surmount.

Will placed one foot in front of the other as he climbed the hill, memories rushing back. He and Morgan once stood on this hill together, kissing in the rain. Gods, he missed her. Will smiled wistfully at the stellar memory. Instead of pushing or shoving the memory away, he simply relieved it, letting it go away on its own. Morgan's smiling face was burned into his memory and no matter how hard he'd try to get her out, it wasn't going to happen. Speaking of which, he had graves to visit. As soon as he was inside the camp's borders, Will set his duffel bags by a tree and padded over the brown needles and through the bare trees, pulling his coat closer to his body. Will's breath came out in short little puffs as he made his way through the barren part of camp. Helios was really not in his favor today. Then again... none of the gods usually were. His horoscope never even was. Against the stormy, pre-winter sky, Will's eyes were a light grey in color. Maybe it would snow soon, possibly giving Will a chance to use his fire-making skills he had picked up while on a camping trip in the mortal world. Will smiled to himself. That camping trip with all of his roommates had definitely been fun and he would've never thought that mortals were capable of fun. And on the trip, he hadn't even flirted with anyone. He was proud of himself for sure.

Coming up to a pair of large, iron gates, Will stopped, pausing to really think again. It was as if the world was holding its breath, to see if William Trevor Michaels could do it. If he could actually walk into the cemetery and not break down. Will took a deep breath of cold air and moved forward. He could do this. He'd been practicing for weeks. It was judgement day, he thought, smiling to himself at the little joke. With rosy cheeks and a pale face, Will treaded lightly across the cemetery and deep into the heart of the dead place. In normal situations, he would've found the place to be creepy or odd, but now it was just somber and quiet. The nearly frozen grass crunched under his feet as he walked further and further, the wind still blowing coldly across his face, pulling his jacket taut against his chest. About twenty feet away, he saw it. Morgan's grave. It was small, almost simple. Just what the daughter of Zeus would've liked. Will stuffed his hands into his pockets and held his shoulders back, approaching the grave.

He stopped in front of the tombstone and opened his mouth. Nothing came out. For a moment, Will wondered if he really could do this? He couldn't doubt himself. Not now. He was so close. He'd made it this far, and he intended to go through with this. He wasn't the boy he used to be. Who he used to be was a person who didn't keep promises. But, now, he was going to make sure that every promise he made was carried out. "Hi." He started with something easy. "Hi, Morgan," Will looked down at his hands, shaking in the cold. "I miss you." Will's voice was steady despite the high emotions. "I'm better now. I don't do any of that crap that I did a few months ago. You were right, too, about all of that stupid stuff I did. It was stupid." Will allowed himself a small chuckle. "I'm not going to dwell on the past now, though. I know that you're gone and there's not a thing in the world that I can do to bring you back but, I'm sure wherever you are, you wouldn't want to come back. I'm sure it's warm there, too."

Morgan, while I was on a camping trip in the Rockies a few weeks ago, I saw this constellation... it... it reminded me of you." Will paused to take a breath and steady his hands. "I got you something, Morgan." Will reached into his pocket and pulled out a beautiful, lunar-blue flower. In the center of the soft, dark-blue petals was a soft yellow center that gave off electric sparks. The plant was the opposite of heliotropic, thermotropic. However, it could grow in almost any environment anyways. That's what he found so beautiful about it. It could adapt to almost any weather. Just like Morgan. "It glows when the person that it's for is happy, even if they're dead." The demigod reached down and set the flower on the grass, sheltered by the gravestone. "I hope you're happy. I truly hope you are.. Even if there was some way I could bring you back, Morgan, and I'm sure there is, I wouldn't do it. I only want for you to be happy. Well, wanted. I only wanted you to be happy. And with me, you weren't happy. Even if you were with me again, you wouldn't be happy. But, I mean, I don't know you, Morgan. I thought that I did, but I didn't.." Will trailed off, his voice cracking up an octave and his eyes on the ground, away from the flower. The boy steadied himself before going on. "I didn't know you, Morgan. I'm so sorry I didn't save you, though. If I could hold you in my arms one last time and tell you that I love you, I would. But, I can't. So, I guess this is it. This is my goodbye." As he finished, his voice held a tone of resonance in the bitter, winter cold. Will gave one last tearful smile and turned to leave. Facing the wind, the snow, the emotions, and next weeks to come would be terrible, but it'd be okay. He knew he'd be okay in the end. He was Will Michaels, grandson of Zeus. He was always okay.